I'm a Thirty-something, single, midwest "girl" who loves to...cook & bake - organize, plan & coordinate - and spend time with family & friends. These are my thoughts, the things I enjoy {often the little things}, everyday stuff that happens, and the ways that God provides for, teaches and shows Himself in big and small ways to me! You will laugh {it is essential} & you will cry {oh...a good cry does a wonder of good for everyone} - sometimes both in the same post!!
Crafting has always been something that I enjoy - at Summer Camp my favorite "excursion" was the Craft Cabin. I love being creative in anything - it's a trait that I greatly enjoy using. That said, crafting always seemed to take a back burner in my life - because I was always super, super busy. So sadly I wasn't able to enjoy it as often as I would have liked. But in the last year and a half that's changed...especially in the last 5 months. I was finding myself at home A LOT more - and that was causing me A LOT more "free time". At first, I'll admit I bucked the idea - I hated it...and it has taken me some time to fall in love again with my home, but I am...and I think my home is loving me being here much more often. I've tried to find various tasks to occupy my time - other than watching TV or being stuck on Facebook or Pinterest {okay that one has actually been a helpful place - so many ideas...a creative person's paradise!}. But, in time I'm slowly starting to enjoy my evenings of coming home, closing the door and not having to rush back out - or my weekends of more time to be home. Don't get me wrong - I loved every moment of the time I did have outside of VdM and I still, greatly, enjoy time away shopping, spending time with friends or family, or whatever the time away may entail. And I still try to get out some - even if I'm alone...because for me being stuck inside alone without social interaction for several evenings in a row is not good for me - I would go bonkier more bonkers, than I already am!
One of the tasks I've taken on is doing more craft projects - in the Spring time I purchased my first ever glue gun...and boy have I given it a run for it's money. I even purchased a second - just to have on hand and because it has a more narrow tip for those smaller, more confined areas needing gluing. Between You-Tube and Pinterest and my own brain, I've found many many projects to keep me going - and my list continually grows of "crafts to make". I'm starting to realize I need to create a designated location for my crafting supplies - which are much more than a glue gun these days. And I'm working on figuring out how to best organize my supplies - oh yeah, another project!
One of my most recent projects was this button letter. My cousin's wife is expecting their first baby, a little girl, in just a few weeks - and we recently had her baby shower. I love giving homemade gifts - some find them cheesy or elementary, but I find them thoughtful and unique. So as I was thinking of what I'd make for Baby Kaylin - I wanted to do something with her initial, that could be used in her nursery and one day her bedroom (possibly). I have had a bucket-o-buttons for some time now, and nothing says cuteness like buttons - what's the old saying..."as cute as a button"! So I decided I'd purchase a wooden "K", paint it pink, cover it in multi-colored girly colored buttons, cover a canvas with fabric and then place in a frame. I searched and researched various ideas and options, and decided to take a little of several options and make it my own.
First I sorted through my buttons and found the sizes and colors I wanted to use - the nursery is gray walls, black furniture and the bedding/accent pieces are going to be bright fun girly colors - pink, purple, yellow, turquoise, etc.
Here is the "K" - almost completely painted. I didn't paint the back - to help with adhering it to the fabric covered canvas.
I used a pretty shade of pink, called Pink Chiffon - so that those places that buttons didn't cover up, wouldn't just be white. I found this paint at Michael's it was Satin Acrylic - so it gave a little sheen when it was dry.
Once the letter was painted - I let it completely dry, and then I "played around" with the buttons to position them and create the design I wanted. It took some time - but it was like putting a puzzle together, just finding which one wentn in the exact location. I had MANY more buttons sorted than needed, but I wanted to make sure I had several size and color options. Once I had the design - I then began attaching the buttons with hot glue. I tried to cover the entire top surface - that's almost impossible since the buttons are round and it's a squared/straight edge. I wanted to make sure it looked like a "K", and not a pile of hot glued buttons - in the end.
This is once all the buttons were glued on. I let them sit overnight to make sure they got good and set. Some had to be re-glued for a more secure fit, but for the most part all of them set up really well. Unfortunately, I forgot to take pictures during the other phase of assembly - but I used a white canvas, gray fabric quarters and a canvas frame kit - all purchased at JoAnn's. The frame was 8x10 - and the actual letter itself was about 5 inches long.
I wrapped the top and sides of the canvas with the fabric quarter, and cut off the excess. I used a staple gun to attach to ensure the material remained taut, and for extra security. The frame kit included Velcro that was attached to the back of the canvas and then lined up with Velcro inside the frame. I also used a staple gun to secure the Velcro to the canvas - just for an extra measure. It came with an adhesive strip - but I was afraid it wouldn't be enough with the natural gradual pull of gravity, as it hangs on a wall.
And this is the final "product". I used a heavy crafting glue to adhere the "K" to the canvas - to again provide extra security. I let it dry flat for the first hour or so, and then set it upright (as it if were hanging on a wall) for about 30 min - to make sure that it wasn't going to slip. The letter itself is not flush, it does sit up "off of the canvas" - so it adds some additional dimension. You can sort of see this in the picture.
Beginning to end the project probably took me 5-6 hours - this includes the sorting of the buttons, as well. It's super cute and my cousin's wife loved it - I hope it will look super cute in Baby Kaylin's nursery.
I plan to do a similar craft - but with paper mache letters, for a Christmas gift for one of my nieces. I'm sure I'll be posting about it in the future.
Next Crafting Corner post - Christmas Ornaments. I'm on a roll getting various ornaments done for myself, family and as a "thank you" gift for the ladies at my table during this year's Christmas Tea. So stay tuned! I also have some recipes - I want to share soon, as well. Along with my Household Management binder and Christmas binder.
Until next time - don't let the glue gun burn you! :)
On Monday evening, summer 2014 evaporated into history...as autumn 2014 quietly made it's entrance from stage right. Summer, 2014 was a great one ~ overall.
A new position...I began my (unofficial) start to summer with a new job. I didn't leave my employer, I just took on a new position within the bank - supporting our COO - Commercial Banking. It has been a WONDERFUL move - on so many levels. I've met many new colleagues, have made new friends and have utilized and expanded my skill set. I wasn't looking to make a move, but this position become available and I felt God calling me to make the move. So I listened. I must admit, I was very hesitant when I saw the position post - my new manager was on my {mental} list of executives I'd consider supporting should the opportunity arise. You see I had {still have} a great relationship with my previous executive - who I supported for four years. So I knew I had to be very selective, should I ever consider leaving my {previous} role. The position posted just days before Easter. An administrative group within the bank e-mailed the posting to all administrative professionals - so when I saw the posting I thought "well that would be a great opportunity for someone, that executive would be a great person to support and it would be a great opportunity for advancement."...never considering myself for the position. Days later while stuffing eggs for the family's egg hunt - the post came to mind, out of no where...again I thought, it would be a great opportunity - for someone, else. The next day, while preparing Easter dinner, once again thoughts of the position filled my mind...this time I was considering myself for this position. But concerns of leaving an executive as the one I supported, added to my "maybe not" list. I had taken the day following Easter off. When I returned on Tuesday, I received a phone call from a fellow admin - who said "I know your answer will probably be "no", because you are happy where you are - but have you considered applying for the position supporting the COO - Commercial Banking?" WOW! I laughed and told her, "well actually I have and I am still considering it - but this phone call has confirmed that I should apply." That evening I stayed a little later at work and applied. By 8:15 a.m. the next day (April 23) HR had contacted my then executive to notify them that I had posted for the position and that I was being heavily considered as a candidate. Within the next two days I had a phone interview, had scheduled additional in-person interviews. By the end of the following week - I had completed 8 in-person interviews and was waiting. By 10:00 a.m. Monday, May 5 - I was offered the job. It was quick, quicker than anticipated. So quick - I barely had a chance to talk to my family about the opportunity. By the end of May I was in my new role! All along the way - God was giving me peace. I never once looked back - I was just looking ahead and allowing Him to lead. I remember after I hit the "apply now" button, I said out loud - at my desk - "well God, if this is what you want you will make it clear, I'm trusting you." An clear it was!! I'm so happy in my position - and can already see how this was a great move for me!
An intruder...it was a June Thursday at 12:32 p.m., I was at Danny's Deli enjoying lunch with a fellow admin., my cell phone caught my eye - as a phone number flashed on the screen. Not wanting to be rude I ignored the call. Within seconds the number flashed up on the screen again. I apologized and said I needed to get the call. "Ms. Thornton this is ADT and we have reports of your motion and front door alarms sounding at your residence - are you okay? Do you need us to call the authorities?"....stunned I didn't know what to say - I felt like I couldn't speak. I told the operator - I wasn't at home and she would need to call the police. I went back to the table and told my lunchmate - I had to leave, someone had broken into my home. The walk back to my desk seemed to take forever - I had to get my purse, keys, laptop, notify my boss. I couldn't get there fast enough - I had to leave. I remember not being able to figure out how to remove my laptop from the docking station and asking the co-worker next to me for help - he seemed confused as to why I couldn't figure it out. (I explained to him at a later time what had happened). I then had to get to my car and get home - again the walk to my car was forever, I walked really fast and then slowed down, really fast and then slow down - at one point I may have even been running. Finally to my car - I had to figure out how to get home. I called my sister - no answer, I had to tell someone - but what do I tell them, I knew nothing. Visions of possible damage to my home were filling my mind. Ugh...another traffic light - please just let me get home!! Finally, I reached home - the police officer walked up to me and asked how my day was...I mean really, what do you want me to say "Oh it's an awesome sun shiny day!"...um hello - I'm here because someone has broken into my home. To not give too many details - we entered the house, found a piece of evidence that confirmed someone had been or was in the house - upon my exit from the house the officer drew his weapon and announced "police - make yourself known"...all of this was going on in my quiet little home. I apologized to the police officer that I hadn't made my bed that morning - he just looked at me and said "It is okay, I have small children - so I'm sure your unmade bed can't compare to the mess they make". The intruder wasn't in the house - PTL, and upon further investigation we discovered how they entered. Thankfully my alarm system scared them - and they didn't have time to take anything of great value from my home...well except for my sense of security. The intruder was caught just two days later, and charges have been pressed and their trial begins in late October. I'm assuming at some point during this trial I will have to testify - and that seems slightly overwhelming, but God will be there with me. My sense of peace and security have begun to return - although I still wake up in the night fearing someone is in my home. But that isn't an every night occurrence - just a few times a week. I thank God for my security system - both on the day of the burglary and now as it helps give me an extra tangible layer of security.
A New Bundle of Joy brings the title of "Father"on Father's Day...As I had mentioned in previous posts my sister and brother-in-law were expecting their first child in late June - but Nephew #3 decided to make his appearance on Father's Day...the best gift a dad could ever receive. After many hours of labor, no progression of dilating and a fever that was rising the doctor's decided that my sister would have an emergency c-section - not what she had planned, but was more than agreeable due to the circumstances. He was born @ 8:56 a.m. weighing 9 pounds 22 inches long - and perfectly beautiful in the eyes of his auntie! :) He and my sister were both healthy, the fever reduced soon after delivery and within two days they were home. The family of 3 have adjusted quite well to their new normal - including the 10-11 hours of sleep each night. My sister recently returned to work, and that has brought some heartache - but she is praying the Lord will open up an opportunity for her to be able to reduce her days away from her bouncing happy boy!
Beach+Wedding+New BIL+New Nephew = All in One Week...Early August brought a family vacation to the beach. Everyone, except Nephew #1, went on the trip. We were sooo excited about the opportunity to get away for a week - and by the time the trip actually had arrived, we were all more than ready for some serious beach time. My family LOVES the beach!! During our planning of the trip - my youngest sister and {then} fiance considered getting married while we were away. After consideration it was decided they'd take full advantage of the opportunity with 99% of the family there. My new BIL's son had already planned to join us - and that was great to have him there with us. We were able to celebrate his 11th Birthday while there - and that was another special memory to have, as well. So now I'm the auntie of nine - 5 nieces and 4 nephews...the boys are quickly gaining on the girls!! The time away was great - and the opportunity to have the hardest decision be pool side or beach side, was WONDERFUL!!
Lots of time on my hands...I still find myself with lots of time on my hands, so I'm trying to find different "things" to do. I've done several crafts - I'll post about them soon. I spent a little more time in my gardens this summer and that was nice. I attempted to grow tomatoes - but wasn't as successful as I had hoped, so maybe next summer. I've started learning to sew with a sewing machine - and that is very exciting to me!! :) I'm looking forward to purchasing a "real" sewing machine soon into the new year. I've created various schedules - cleaning schedules, cooking schedules, craft schedules, encouragement to others schedules, etc. Summer is always a little slower in the kitchen, because it is so hot...with a semi-cooler than usual summer I did do a little more experimenting than usual this summer. Mastering a few recipes I've wanted to try - like buffalo sauce, oh yummolicious!! I was able to treat the new parents to a meal once a week for the first five weeks after delivery - and that was a great treat for me, and hopefully for them as well. With the cooler evenings approaching and fall-like Saturdays, I'm sure the oven will be warming up on a more frequent basis! Stay tuned.
Aging Parents - Summer brought a few hurdles in this area. About two weeks before we left on vacation my dad found out he needed a pacemaker placed - and it had to happen pre-vacation. So one week before we left, his pacemaker was placed. All went well with the placement and recovery has been pretty much event free. PTL! Mom is doing okay - but the Dementia is much more present these days, even with her meds. She still has her independence and can fully function as normal for the most part - but her reasoning/thought process, decision making rational are steadily deteriorating. As siblings we are always looking at ways to assist her, as much as she will let us - and still allow her to maintain that independence that she needs and we need her to have...it is a fine line, but so far we've walked it pretty well. The new "endeavor" is the grocery store and food preparation. We've learned, through observation, that mom quickly becomes overwhelmed with too many decisions - and she picks whatever she see first. For example - during a trip to the ice cream shop she would normally pick blackberry chip - it has been her "go to" for as long as I can remember. However, she recently selected Cherry - because it was the first option that she saw...when asked "are you sure - they have blackberry chip?" she said - "oh well then yes, I want that - I didn't see it on the list." Or when going to a restaurant she'll ask - "what are you having?" or "what do you like here?" This allows her {in her thought process} to not show us that she's struggling...but we've caught on, after she's ordered "not normal to her" options. So we always make sure we help her with her selection - in a very non-offensive way, pointing out options that we know she'd like. That said, we've noticed that when asking what they've (the parents) have had for dinner...it has been very random combinations of items. So we've come to the conclusion that determining what's for dinner may be slightly overwhelming and she selects whatever she first sees - like a tomato and onion sandwich, yes that was a recent item! Our plan - to join her in her grocery shopping and to create a meal schedule of what she has available, and assisting with pre-meal prep as much as we can...so that she is able to put together a more normal dinner. Together my family and I will make this journey as tolerable as possible for everyone involved, but I can't promise you I won't cry from time to time - as I watch my mom slowly slip away.
God has been continually gracious to me - with a new job, watching over my home, ministering in my church via VBS and the meal ministry, adding to my family, allowing me the opportunity to learn new things like sewing and doing crafts, and love for my parents as we walk this road of aging.
So much has happened since my last post...as seems to be the case with my blog over the last few year - but with the new laptop, I'm hoping that blogging will again become a regular "thing".
So where do I begin - well Maria says we should "start at the very beginning it is a a very good place to start" {okay who else is singing...I heart Sound of Music!}
So the beginning...hmm, okay....
Ryan and Jenni were married during sunset on the white sands of Marco Island surrounded by their families and a couple close friends last August. Then at Thanksgiving they announced Baby Young would be arriving in June, 2014. February revealed that Baby Young would be Baby Boy Young..and we eagerly anticipate his arrival in just a few weeks!!!! ..oh maybe I'm jumping ahead some!
The end of August brought the start of school - and that meant Emily would move into the dorms for the first time, as she started her Sophomore year at Capital University. She spent her entire Senior year of high school in a program that allowed her to get her entire first year of college completed (and it was 100% paid for, including books and parking). So when she graduated from high school last spring, she also completed her Freshmen year of college. What an excellent opportunity that was for her. She has since completed her first year of dorm life and second year of college. I'm so proud of her. The kiddos also had a great year of school - Sophia finished 5th grade {wowzas!}, Elijah completed 4th grade, and Ayana ended 3rd grade. All of them had a stellar year - excellent grades, various acknowledgements along the way and much learning was had!!
After several tests and doctors visits my wonderful mom was diagnosed with Early Onset Dementia - in late August early September. It was a blessing to find out what was causing the symptoms she had been experiencing for some time. Then in January/February we discovered that she had 3 degenerating discs in her back. Mom just turned 70 last summer, and prior to these aliments she had been extremely healthy and prided herself in the fact that she only took a multi-vitamin each day....and that was voluntary. It has been very hard to watch this happen. For the most part the meds that she is on help her dementia, and we are encouraging her to keep her routine normal and still do the things she loves/wants to do...we don't/can't coddle her, she won't and shouldn't allow it. The day will come when these things won't be a luxury anymore, and until then it's as normal as we can make it.
In September I began attending a Life Group at church. We meet on Sunday evenings, most Sundays for a couple of hours, and it is a really great time. I am really learning to get to know each of them and I do look forward to our time together.
In October my youngest sister, Kari, announced that she was engaged. She and her fiance, John plan to get married this summer.
The first Saturday in November I spent 4.5 hours taking the Certified Administrative Professionals Exam...something I had wanted to take for many, many years - and I finally did it. After months of studying and reading, I took the hardest test in my life. Even with 19 years of administrative experience, I still struggled and completed with only 2 min. left to spare. My mind was fried literally. I got lost coming home - and usually I'm extremely good with directions, and especially when my destination is home! :) After almost 8 weeks of waiting I received the letter a day or so after Christmas, and I PASSED!!! I was soooooo proud of myself and shocked!! I had wanted this for so long and finally I was able to be successful and accomplish something I had so desperately wanted. I was beginning to lose hope in accomplishing my goals and attaining dreams I had had for many years. But this encouraged my heart. Many weren't surprised I passed, but I was - many never even asked about the test prep or how my studying was going (only once did something ask in the entire 9 months of studying). I don't know why that was - maybe they thought it was a given...I wasn't certain of anything until I received that letter
The holiday were filled with busyness, traditions - some old, some new and a lot of joyful times. Christmas Eve held the arrival close friends daughter - Violet...that was a special Christmas treat!
Winter was cold, colder and coldest - along with snow, snowy and snowed in. We learned phrase such as polar vortex and snow rollers. Even winter fanatics were ready for Winter 2013-2014 to END. It had been 20 years since temps reached as low as they did - for extended periods of time. 20 years ago - that seems like ages ago...but really 20 years was 1994 and that was the year I graduated from high school...YIKES!!
Another trip to Hocking Hills - our 5th trip to be exact. It was a good weekend. The weather was nice. The food was great. Some didn't feel so well. Reecie girl - really struggled. But all-in-all it was a good weekend. Jenni, Lisa and I did a craft - to help pass the time on Saturday, and to allow Lisa to enjoy something she hadn't had much time to enjoy - since Violet's arrival. I enjoyed some kitchen therapy...I always enjoy that no matter where I am.
Springtime brought another birthday - I struggled a little, but I tried to keep that to myself. Something I'm learning to do a lot of lately. I wasn't overly thrilled about celebrating - but people wanted to so I let them, but I would have been fine to just let it go on by this year. Don't get me wrong - God has blessed me in so many ways and he has graciously allowed for me to have 38 years on this earth...I don't take that lightly. But it is very obvious that something is missing. Someone once told me to not dwell on the situation - and I don't, they of course didn't see it that way. I dwell in the situation...and that is completely different.
At the beginning of May I was offered a new job. I wasn't looking for a new job - I was very happy and content with my (then) current job. But several different occurrences led me to apply for the position and within 2 weeks of applying the position was mine. I began the new position last Tuesday. I really enjoy it - I'm learning a lot. My days are super busy and go very (almost at times too) fast. I know God has a plan for me here - and my desire is to bloom where he has planted me.
Next week - I'm excited to say I'll be teaching VBS. Next week will be two years that I left the only other church I had known. It seems like it has been longer than 2 years, and other days it feels like it was just last week. But I LOVE my "new" church. I'm starting to learn names and remember them with faces (that match the names). God has really worked in my life in the last two years. He is stretched me and molded me, and that excites me. I look forward to working with the kids next week. I pray I'm a vessel that I teachable, used by and for God and a reflection of God's love.
So that's where I've been. I'm sure I've missed out on some journey's along the way, but those are the mile markers that stick out to me!
Has it really been a year and a half since I last blogged...WOWZAS!! I sure have missed it, and much has happened in my life. Let's see since December 30, 2011 I've...
kept up some on 40x2016 goals...to name a few - lots of recipes are happening in the Megalicious kitchen, I've built a shoe organizer and assemblied my garden hose housing unit, learned to trim the front bushes (self-taught...thank you very much...and I only distroyed one extension cord). I remain looking to accomplish these;
been promoted to Executive Administrative Assistant. I was already doing many aspects of the job, so it was a nice to get the title (officially)...and a compensation reward as well;
paid off my car...HUGE deal and a reminder of God's faithfulness of provision to me!!;
started studying for the Certified Professional Secretaries Exam, which I'll take on Saturday, November 2. This will be a great accomplishment, and if I pass I plan to take the Organizational Management test the Spring, 2014. Both would be great assets to starting a Personal Assistant business;
gone through another time of depression, and it is a daily struggle to overcome...but each day is better, and those days that aren't - well I have the next day to look forward to...Winter 2012/2013 was extremely rough;
followed God's leading and in June, 2012 left the church I'd known my whole life. It was one of the hardest and most rewarding things I've ever done spiritually and emotionally. But God is growing me, breaking me and molding me to bring glory to Him;
found a new church to call home, and I'm growing...but I want to grow so much more - and I'm looking forward to the summer bible study program they are offering. I'm hoping to meet new people...maybe even that someone special kind of people - ahem! But that's not the focus (well not totally...but I will be keeping an eye out!)
watched my family grow physically and numerically. Well the numerical part will come on August 1st when my sister will marry the love of her life, who happens to also be one of my very best friends, during a sunset ceremony on the beach in Marco Island, FL! I'm so excited for them!! The nieces and nephews are growing physically (all but three are now taller than me), emotionally and intellectually - what a blessing to be a part of their lives. One niece graudated High School and will start college in the fall...so stinkin' proud of that young lady;
watched my parent's age - this hasn't been easy;
been re-certified in CPR, along with a good friend...have no fear when I'm around;
found myself with a lot of free time, so I'm trying to figure out how to fill it - but not too much...been taking some classes to learn things I've always wanted to learn, attending a few ladies Bible studies and finding my way around the kitchen even more so than usual;
organized a few different service projects for my family - with one being last summer when we made 60 sack lunches and took them to homeless people throughout the C-bus area...talk about a humbling experience. It was the hottest day of the entire summer - temps were well over 100*...thankfully we had cold bottles of water to give them as well. The thing I learned most that day - individuality is important to a homeless person...almost all of them instantly shared their name with us. Almost to say - "there is a name that goes with this face, and that makes me just like you...I'm a person, not a group!";
not done much traveling - that I can think of...although I feel like I did...maybe that is just wishful thinking;
experienced the strained seperation of a beloved family member. For a long time I tried to fix the situation myself; however, I learned that I had to give it ALL to God...and that's what I've done. Only God can change the heart and that is my prayer;
lived at Villa de Megalicious (VdM) for 5 years now - again another reminder of God's faithful provision to me;
remained single - not by choice. "Single and Desperately Looking" The desire to marry has intensified greatly, and the reality of my loneliness is there everyday...but I'm trusting God to provide in this area. I'm trying to do a few things to make myself more "out there"...like visible - not like..."oh that girl is out there!" So we will see!!; and
started blogging again...after a long sabbatical. I've have probably missed a few things...but these seem to be the highlights that are coming to me right now!
I hope I still have some followers, and if I do - it's nice to be back with you again! Until we meet again...
Hi Friends!! Were you afraid I had forgotten about my blog...I haven't! I actually think of it often, but I've not taken the time to update! A friend, follower and fellow blogger sent me a text the other day with a soft reminder that it's been awhile since I've blogged...and she is VERY right.
A lot has happened since I last posted...let's see, here are some highlights -
I helped coordinate a wedding for two of my bestest friends! It was a very lovely day and they both looked stunning!
I've started on my scripture memory quest - currently working on Proverbs 31. Titus 2 is next.
I cooked Easter Dinner for my family!
I've had overnight guests - twice!!
I've purchased and was approved for a passport!! Oh snap!!
I've purchased tickets for a trip - more details to come after that occurs! Let's just say - I can't wait!! :)
I, along with the rest of the family, participated in my neighborhood carport sale! It was a semi-success. The items I didn't sell - I loaded in to the car and donated them to charity. I figured it they are outside of my house - they aren't going back in!! It was so nice to get rid of stuff that I don't use any more. I also signed up for the local Kidney Foundation to put me on their monthly pick-up schedule - so I can continue to the process of simplifying.
I've started recycling - some...I need to get better at this!
I've lost 20 pounds! This has been a huge task for me...I have 40 more to go. I just love food so much!! But I'm learning to love exercise, and the way I feel in my clothes now!
I planted a perennial garden, on my back patio! I love it! My mom got me a couple of solar globes stakes for my Birthday, and I put them in this garden - they change various colors starting at dusk and rotate throughout the night - I love it!
I celebrated my Birthday! I hosted a pottery painting party at my favorite studio for friends and family- and it was a lot of fun!! Jenni provided the delicious food at this party and at my family cook-out. I also enjoyed two other birthday dinners!!
VBS is just around the corner, so I've been busy coordinating and planning - I'm so anxious and excited for it to be here.
Because of the enormous amount of leaves at Villa de Megalicious, and because I felt like I was going to go crazy keeping up with cleaning them up - I purchased a leaf blower/mulcher dealy-o...it looks like a bazooka and it's almost as tall as I am (STOP LAUGHING!!) . Let's just say - I could be dangerous. But so far - I've not broken a nail! :)
I've started creating some of the cleaning, home maintenance, holiday/seasonal decorating schedules.
I've started working on a couple of original recipes!
I'm hosting/coordinating a Book/Bible Study for teen girls (8th grade and above) in my home this summer! We meet on Tuesday evenings from 6:30 p.m. - 8:45 p.m. We are studying "Lies Young Women Believe - and the Truth that Will Set Them Free" - I highly recommend this book!! I have four girls that attend, and it's a great opportunity to build a connection with them and to invest into their lives.
I've started disciplining/witnessing to a teen girl who is facing various struggles/issues right now. I must say, I don't feel equipped to fill this roll - but God has given me the right words, verses, etc. just as I need them. We are building a connection, and I'm hoping that our time together is helping her. She's not a believer, but attends a church faithfully - she knows her need of salvation, she's just not ready yet (those are her words, not mine). So that has been something we've talked about in great detail.
I assisted in coordinating IBC's Mother/Daughter Luncheon! I enjoyed it a great deal, although it was one of the more stressful events I've planned!
I've been at Huntington for almost one year now...hard to believe, I know!
Meg's Meal Ministry is slowly getting back up and "running". I was able this week to provide a meal for a young family who has been visiting our church. I have a list of meals to make and people to have in my home...I just need to make the time. I'm hoping that the mid-July early August I'll be able to be doing more in this area - and increasing it in the coming months.
I was asked to make an appreciation breakfast for volunteers who work in our church's Maternity Resource Center. It's not until September - but I'm so excited about this. I've never done anything like this for so many people (40 ish)...and I'm looking forward to the challenge!!
We are doing some Life Skills classes with the ladies @ IBC (High School age and above) - and I was asked to teach a class on Crock-Pot/Slow Cooker Cooking. That's coming up at some point this Summer/early Fall. I must say, this one I'm a little nervous about! We have many wonderful cooks at IBC - and I really hope I am able to meet the desires/expectations of the ladies in the class!! I'm hoping to show them crock-pots aren't only for making Soup or Pot Roast.
As you can see - a lot has occurred, and hopefully you see why I've not posted in a while. I feel I'm missing some thing - and it's probably something big. But honestly - I'm starting to see a pattern, that I don't like - I'm using the word "I" a lot! It's not really I that is doing all of this - it's actually God. He is the one who is providing and working in many of these areas - I'm just a vessel He is choosing to use. Several items on here are part of the goals I've set for myself - and while some are things I've purposely begun or started...some are simply doors that I've seen God open...the Crock-Pot class, disciplining the teen girl, the appreciation breakfast opportunity. I must say that it's exciting to see what God is doing in my life and through me - and while right now I'm feeling slightly disconnected from a place that once felt like home - I'm rejoicing that I'm very connected to God, and I'm enjoying walking with Him...following His lead.
More to come...on those things listed above and other topics not yet discussed! Hope you are still following me!! :)
Well my birthday is soon approaching...it's not for another month and a half, but it's on my mind - I LOVE birthdays, especially MINE! Although I must admit I'm not - or I should say, I wasn't - looking forward to this one...its a milestone birthday! And quite honestly, I wasn't happy about it's arrival, because there were two things I wanted most of all to be present in my life by this time - and they aren't. I NEVER thought I would be 35...single (not even a perspective date in sight), and childless. When I was younger and dreamed of life at this age - I dreamed of marriage and a house full of children (4 minimum). But that's not what God has planned for my life, and I've really struggled with this for some time now...more and more as the birthday gets closer.
Each year for my birthday, I get myself a gift...I mean why not? I work hard, stay busy serving with my ministries and serving the Lord, and usually put others before myself - so why not buy myself a gift every once in awhile!! But this year as I've thought about what I wanted - I thought what I would do, is give myself a gift that will take me 5 years to accomplish...that's right 5 years!!! Okay I'll be honest...I usually like the instant gratification, especially when it relates to gifts!! I should note that I'm stealing this idea, sorta, from a fellow blogger - so I must admit the idea is not original to me - but the plan of action is completely original and 100% related to me. I've decided that I would set 40 different goals for myself and work towards achieving each one before I turn 40 in May, 2016. I feel like all of these goals are very attainable and very realistic. Some of these goals are fairly simple and will easily be obtained in no time - while others will take a lot of dedication, hard work and commitment. Some will allow me to use my time giving back to others in ways I've wanted to, but haven't because I am Single - for example, I've always wanted to lead a Ladies Bible Study, but I've never been asked because I'm Single and apparently can't relate to other women - so instead, I'm going to use this desire and my passion for teen girls to lead a Summer Bible Study for girls 8-12th grade - with the hopes of it becoming a yearly "event" each Summer. Some are items that I've just always wanted to do and I've not taken the time to for whatever reason. Some will allow me to enjoy my home and allow others to enjoy it as well - I hate being at home alone. However, God has provided me with a beautiful home that I pay for each month - I need to enjoy it, care for it and I need to use it serve and glorify Him...so instead of keeping myself so busy that I'm never home, I'm going to allow myself time to be at home and also have others into my home on a more regular basis through various things. I'm also going to take some time to learn some things that I've always wanted to learn and accomplish some tasks that I've always told myself I could never do - like change the oil in my car or build something with tools - YIKES!.
My list of goals will be a gift I give to myself - it will allow me to use my desires, passions, gifts and talents to show myself that I do have a place in this world...even if I'm walking alone. So as I accomplish or work towards different goals - I'll blog about it! Which, blogging more is a goal that I've set, because I love it and it allows me to speak, when usually I'm very silent at home...a one way conversation never gets too far!! :)
Spiritual Growth, Ministry or Community Involvement
Lead a Teen Girl’s Bible Study in the Summer for 5 years
Meg’s Meal Ministry - 1) One monthly meal in home with dinner guest(s); 2) One monthly meal provided outside of the home to friends, family, neighbors or those in need; and 3) Provide dinner once a year at the Ronald McDonald House
Get to know my neighbors by name and something about them
Become involved in my Community Association
Memorize 35 different passages (series of verses or whole chapters) of scripture
Start a Hospitality Ministry
Disciple a teen girl one-on-one
Provide monthly support to a missionary or missionary endeavor, with the goal being to support two in the end of five years
Go on a Mission’s Trip and/or spend a week one week one summer working in a Camp Kitchen
Hold a Backyard Bible Club
Educational or Professional
Take and complete two certificate programs @ CSCC
Start my own business
Just to say I can do it…
Build something
Learn how to change the oil in my car
Organization, Arts/Crafts, Hobbies or Life Skills
Try one new recipe each month and blog about it
Create and keep a weekly, bi-weekly, monthly and quarterly cleaning, household maintenance and seasonal decorating schedule
Host and lead a cooking/entertaining/hospitality class in my home
Grow a container veggie garden
Make smart financial decisions – learn to coupon and reduce my spending
Learn to Can
Learn to sew by hand and with a machine
Re-organize Villa de Megalicious – and simplify
Create 5 original recipes
Grow an herb garden
Remodel my main bathroom
Make homemade gifts for Christmas for each person on my list
Recreational or Healthy Living
Blog…more!
Allow for at least 2 weeknights per week to be at home for the majority of the evening
Allow for one Friday night or Saturday a month for myself
Read 10 new books – outside of books read for Bible studies/ADG classes and blog my review
Implement and keep an exercise routine
Paint my guest room - yes this is in the right spot...if I don't do this soon - I will go crazy(ier); therefore, this falls under Healthy Living!
Attend various festivals in Ohio each spring, summer and fall – that I’ve always wanted to go to but never taken the time
Travel outside of the country
Find an activity to do with each niece and nephew, individually to spend some quality time on a regular basis
Go to Washington DC – preferably in the Spring to see the Cherry Blossom
Learn to not feel guilty when I say “no” or “not right now” - again part of Healthy Living!
Have dinner with all of my siblings, at least once every three months. Just the five of us (including my SIL here!)
Buy and regularly ride a bicycle
Establish and use a Recycle center/system at home - yet again...Healthy Living!
So there you have it...my 40 by (May) 2016!! It's going to be a FUN 5 years!!! On my mark, get ready, get set and...GO!!!!
WOW! Another year has come, and is almost gone. I can't believe it's almost over, yet on the other hand I can't believe it's taken this long to get here!
2010 has been one of the hardest years I've ever had...yet I've learned more about myself, others and God this year. It's been filled with some pretty deep lows and some pretty big highs - and lots of middle of the road stuff.
In this last year I've found myself on my knees begging God to heal a sick friend, pleading for a job, weeping to provide comfort to my lonely heart and urging for understanding in situations that I don't understand. I've gained a prayer partner, new family members, friendships and a new job. God has used my meal ministry to feed many through various ways, and my administrative/organizations skills to lead a ministry I never thought I'd have the honor of leading. God has given and He has taken away. God provided protection during the unusually snowy winter and allowed Ohioans a beautiful Spring, Summer, Fall and even an Indian Summer. But in all of 2010 I've found it to be true that God has remained faithful, even when I wavered. He's provided strength in my weakness. And it's only because of Him that I was able to face everyday this year.
Enjoy a re-cap of some of the highlights, and dimmed lamps of my year...
January ~
The Ohio State Football Buckeyes provided us with a win in the Granddaddy of them all the Rose Bowl. Beating the Oregon Ducks 26 to 17.
A "new" ministry began at IBC - on that I had prayed for for a long time. A Small Group started on Thursday evenings for young adults...and I've enjoyed attending and getting to know some fellow brothers and sisters in Christ; although I'm not really that young anymore - or at least not as young as many of them.
I found out that Ashley was pregnant and that the end of Summer would take me in to my next phase of life...being a Great Aunt!
I found out that my job would be transferred to Pittsburgh at the end of May. I had to decided whether to move or quit my position...within two weeks. I decided to stay in C-bus, and to work until the office closed or I found another position...which ever came first.
IBC Commissioned and sent Kristie to Romania - what a joy it was to watch this young woman follow the Lord's leading...what a blessing to have ministered to and with her!
February ~
I had to say my temporary good-bye to my sweet friend, Penny. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done and I miss her so much.
Our Small Group was able to minister to IBC and the MRC. The guys did some minor repairs around the building, while the ladies made no-sew blankets for MRC clients.
March ~
Jenni, Kari and I took a chartered bus trip that we will never forget. Wendy's Mom and brother, Tom, joined us. It was interesting to say the least.
I again was able to volunteer at the Children's Hospital Heme Weekend @ Deer Creek.
Tim, Lisa, Ryan, Jenni and I spent a beautiful weekend in Hocking Hills - lots of fun!!
I had "coffee" (okay we both had Hot Chocolate!) with someone I knew in High School - yet we'd never really met or knew each. It's been great getting to know her, and to minister/worship with she and her family @ IBC.
April ~
I was blessed to hear Ken Rudolph speak again...at the Good Friday service.
My cousin Tony got married to his long-time girlfriend, Ashley. Ashley has felt like family for a long time, but it is wonderful to officially have her as a member!
Our family again participated in the MS Walk! We walk in hopes of finding a cure for everyone with MS - but especially Wendy & Clyde!
It's (another) Girl! Ashley found out her bundle of joy was a girl!
Sophia started the process of getting braces!
I saw Tim McGraw in concert with Jenni, Kari & Lisa!
I was again able to chaperon the West High Ensemble trip to Virginia Beach. It was a beautiful weekend! I LOVE the Beach!! I LOVE the kids!!
May ~
Ayana turned 5!
After several months of searching, many hours of meeting and countless hours of reading resumes. The IBC Search Committee narrowed the candidates to four! We met all four, interviewed them and their wives - I had the joy of cooking for two of the four meals!
Hayden played his last official High School baseball game and was crowned Prom King all in the same week. He later played in the City League All Star Game.
I found out I was going to be the Director of IBC's VBS - to be held on June 27...YIKES!
I turned 34 - one year from my scary age!
I ended my chapter as an employee of Direct Energy - and said goodbye to many co-workers and friends.
June ~
I had a phone interview with Huntington Bank (this was just one of many interviews I had had over the 5 months of searching)
The Search Committee decided on our candidate and presented him to the Deacon's...Pastor Brad Rickard.
Due to my unemployment I was able to volunteer at Westgate's Field Day - what a super treat!
Hayden became the second graduate of the third generation from West High School, where he read "The Road Less Traveled" by Robert Frost.
I had a face to face interview with Josh Eichenhorn and Andy Keusal at Huntington Bank
Beth came home! I'm so glad December 2011 holds another visit of my non-Asian friend who lives in Asia!
I spent my days of unemployment looking for additional opportunities, enjoying the start of summer break with the nieces and nephews, and planning/preparing VBS details/materials.
I was offered and accepted a job at Huntington Bank in their Commercial Credit Department supporting the EVP - Commercial Credit Sr. Loan Approval Officer and the VP - Training and Development.
I directed VBS at IBC, and started my new job the day after VBS started!
Hayden turned 18!
July ~
I began commuting via COTA!
I traveled to Troy, MI for training...it was my first trip to the state up North!
Ashley graduated from Cosmetology school!
Pastor Brad Rickard candidated, was called and accepted the call to be Sr. Pastor at IBC! PRAISE THE LORD!
Kari & the kids had a wonderful week at Family Camp and Emily had another great week at TLC!
I enjoyed the Ladies Summer Bible/Book Study on Sunday evenings!
August ~
Emily made the Varsity Volleyball team.
Elijah began his first season of football, while Sophia and Ayana enjoyed their first season of Cheering.
Our Small Group "hosted" the IBC Picnic - Brunch version! While I did very little in terms of planning...it seemed to be enjoyed by many!
IBC voted to move AWANA to Wednesday evenings and eliminate youth for grades K-6...it was a rather big deal - but shockingly had very little discussion at the time of the meeting!
I "returned" as a Youth Leader for IBC's IT group!
Ayana entered Kindergarten - the sixth in the second generation to attend Westgate.
Hayden moved into the dorms and began his college career at Capital University.
Ashley delivered a beautiful little girl...Gabriella Rose!
September ~
I enjoyed a weekend of camping with friends!
Ohio State beat Miami!
Pastor Brad began his time at IBC!
I began meeting with my prayer partner...what an encouragement!
I began my second year of WHS Athletic Booster Special Events Coordinator.
Tim & Lisa were engaged!! I'm enjoying helping them coordinate!
October ~
Was the most difficult month as I suffered greatly with the singleness issue.
Ashley passed her State Boards!
Dad's health really started to decline.
I enjoyed a weekend in VanOrder Land bonding with some girlfriends, and meeting a new acquaintance. I look forward to getting to know her more in 2011 - when she moves to C-bus!
I ventured out of my norm - and went to a Girl's Night Out with people I really didn't know. It was a ceramics painting party at a place (ironically) called "Outside the Lines". I'm looking forward to the next one on January 7.
IBC tragically and quickly lost one of it's most faithful servants - Al Webster
The annual Thornton Harvest Party @ Jenni's was another highlight to the Fall season.
Terry (the kids Dad) was in a tragic and sever car accident - that has changed all of our lives forever.
The AGDO (Annual Girls' Day Out) with all the Thornton women + Grandma Rosie (Wendy's Mom) involved Apple Picking and lunch at the Nutcracker in Pataskla. Katrina joined us this year - as did Chrissy & Livi!
November ~
The Republicans had huge wins in Ohio and all across the USA on Election Day.
I enjoyed my first ever Veteran's Day off at the movies - alone! A tradition I think I'll keep!
I enjoyed a day with my Mom at the Outlet Malls...we love to shop!
Hayden decided to switch to Ohio Dominican beginning Winter Semester, 2011.
I held and comforted my niece, as she sat heartbroken and sobbing in my front seat - telling me that her boyfriend had just moments before broken-up with her.
I coordinated the kitchen portion of the Thanksgiving Eve Fest @ IBC...little did I know the blessing I would receive, from such a little meal. At 8:00 p.m. - one of the girls (approx. 5 yrs old) prayed to thank God and said that was the first thing she had to eat ALL DAY - and as she was literally shoveling it in my heart broke for her.
Jenni and I braved the Pre-Black Friday mania and stood outside Toys 'R Us for two hours in the pouring rain on Thanksgiving night, and then conquered Black Friday. The deals were so worth it and we saved so much. But the time, laughter and memories made with my sister were priceless. I believe this too is going to be a tradition.
For the 7th year in a ROW Ohio State defeated the Michigan Wolverines.
December ~
We "brought back" our tradition of baking Christmas cookies at IBC, per the request of Emily & Kari. It wasn't the 1900+ as in years past, but we still had a lot and enjoyed spending the day together.
Ashley turned 21!
The IBC Dinner Theater & WHS Ensemble performance are always a highlight to me.
The Thornton Family sorted the Christmas Cards at IBC for the 24th year in a row!
The Annual Thornton Sister's Shopping Adventure was just that...an adventure! But we were productive and found some super deals!
Katrina heard the Christmas story for the first time - EVER!
Christmas Eve and Christmas Day were both spent with family, and lots of love was demonstrated. But our focus was the true meaning of Christmas - Christ's Birth!
I was able to cross an item off of my Bucket List - attending a Harlem Globetrotter's game.
So there it is...2010 through my eyes and experiences...whew, I made it threw! Looking forward to 2011, and all it has in store!
I was never, nor will I ever be, an all "A" student! Super duper to all you out there who are! Two gold stars for you! However, I was a faithful "B" or "C" student - I worked very hard to get those grades, and my parents knew it...so they never pushed me to get straight "A" - but they did encourage me to do my best, and if they knew I could get an "A"...they gently nudged me that way. However, I never wanted to see a "D" on my report card - and most definitely never an "F". Thankfully, I never saw either! Because to me those were failing, and I've always been afraid of failing. Which is why I'm not really one to be the first one on the dance floor, to be the first to share, and you'd never see me play a sport. It's not because I don't like them - it's because I was afraid I'd fail. I've always been one to have many great ideas - but I'm too afraid to try...for instance, I've always dreamed of having my own business but I never have...because,what if I fail?
However right now I feel like I'm failing, and I'm so discouraged. I'm so angry right now. Those who don't know me well probably don't see it - but those who do...know I'm struggling. Someone told me earlier this year that I needed to be more transparent, to show people that I struggle. I don't like to do that - it shows I'm weak and that I have failures. But actually it only shows I'm human. So hear we go...
Recently, I baked a cake from scratch for my sister's birthday - and this cake was the detail that sent my heart and mind full force into failure mode. My sister wanted a yellow cake with chocolate icing. I thought "Done!". I can handle this - I've done it several times. Cake & Icing from scratch - no problem! (Although from scratch was not what she required) Since I didn't have a yellow cake recipe I was set on making - I searched for the perfect cake. She kept telling me a box mix is just fine. "NO! That's boring!" (those who know me - know I thoroughly enjoy making everything from scratch). So I found the recipe> I studied it. Read comments about it and adjusted my recipe to match some of the suggestions. I made the cake - the batter was a little runny, but it was still cake batter consistency. It looked and tasted delish in batter form. The cake baked at just the right amount of time, and looked perfect! As they cooled I made the Chocolate Fudge icing! Soon the cooled cake was iced. Everything looked perfect. However later on when it was time to eat the cake - I realized something wasn't right. I could barely get the candles in the cake. I'm serious when I say I had to shove them into the cake. I began laughing outside - but inside I was dying...I was crying, how embarrassing - I FAILED. I wanted this to be perfect for my sister, who does so much for me, and this cake was hard...like as a brick, not like hard to make. Finally I got the candles into the cake. We turned the lights off and sang. And then it was time to cut into this cake. It was solid - I mean not a crumb came off this cake and it stood perfectly still during transition from platter to plate. It looked horrible. It tasted even worse - it was solid and you couldn't really swallow it. I continued to laugh - because I knew if I stopped laughing I would burst into tears. I held it together for the rest of the celebration. But once I hit the car - hours later - the tears came. Okay so I know you are probably thinking - "wow, that's a little emotional over cake". But you see it wasn't the cake, exactly, it was a combination of many things that have led up to that cake. I feel like in so many areas of my life - I'm starting to see where I've failed, and where I'm failing. I'm crushed. I'm angry. I'm frustrated. I'm mad. I feel I've failed in many things...but the two I'm struggling with right now are...
As a friend I've failed - I love my friends. It takes me a long time before I will call someone my friend. Because I have to learn to trust a person. In reality - I only have a few true friends, and I have MANY close acquaintances. My friends are my third layer of my foundation...God, Family and Friends. Since I'm older than most of my friends...I try to be an encouragement to them. I try to be an example to them. I try to always be there for them. I try to remember things in their life. Like...a big sister. However, I'm finding out that in my approach I'm failing my friends, because apparently they feel as though they can't be real with me. Within the last year, I've learned some things about my friends that aren't necessarily things I would do with my life. Does it make them wrong and me right - NO. Doesn't even make them wrong. They are just different choices than I would make. Yet, I still love them and I'm not going to judge them - (we are required to compare our lives to Biblical standards, NEVER to judge...that's God's job). If they asked for my opinion, I would share it - but it doesn't change how I feel about them or how I see them. It hurt even more when I found out that others knew and had known for a long time - months, even years about this. I was crushed. Not because I wasn't the first to know - but because everyone knew and I didn't. It was like a big joke once I found out - people even laughed that I finally knew. That hurt so bad. But apparently they feel they can't share these things with me. How horrible. How sad. That my friends don't even feel they can be 100% honest with me. At some point I must have done or said something that makes them feel they can't share these things. The same friend who told me I needed to be real, is the same friend who said - "well we don't share things with you because you are so perfect". I'M NOT PERFECT! I'M NOT! But yet they felt like not telling me was okay. I'm a big girl folks - I deal with real life stuff every day. The last thing I need is for my friends to feel they can't be who they are in front of me - all of the time. They ask me to be real -yet, how am I supposed to be 100% real with struggles that I have when they aren't being real with every day things that they do. Some where along the way I've failed, and I'm not the friend I thought I was or tried to be. Seems it bit me in the butt for caring too much to take a stand, or encourage a friend to have a closer walk with God, a life without so much drama, or just simply to show that I cared no matter what they say or do.
As a woman I've failed - Women were created to be a helper to a man. Women were created to have children. Women were given the desires to be both of these things...at the time of my birth it was naturally given to me by God to have the desire to want to marry and have children. Yet it's a desire that God hasn't fulfilled - nor has he taken away. SO for those who say "maybe you are too focused on it", well you tell me how I can change a natural desire that I have...oh yeah, and I'm only going to listen if you know how I feel. Meaning you are either my age or older, are single and have no children. All the rest of you - well you don't understand! You don't get it and you never will. So for a moment - sit back and see what life is like for someone who desires so badly to have what you have - and can't get it, because God has said "NO." I'm now less than six months from my scary age of 35. I never in a million years would have thought at 35 I would be single and without a child. Since I was a little girl, all I dreamed about was being a wife and mother...and neither of those things have been given to me. I have no one in my life that could be a possible mate. The one relationship I did have in my life - he only wanted the benefits of having a girlfriend in private, but in public was too ashamed of me to tell his family or friends...and today people laugh about it and some don't even know it existed. And for those who are thinking it...no we did not have sex, and yes he was a Christian. For some reason God doesn't see fit for me to have this sort of love. And it hurts, it sucks! I'm not saying that I don't have love - I do...from my family and others around me. But I'm talking about the love of a husband. I know that God loves me - I know that...so I'm not talking about that type of love either. It just hurts to know that God didn't select me to be married. Before you start asking well where have you tried...I've tried everywhere - I've paid money to join Match.com and E-harmony, and how stewardly is that for months on end to pay $35+ for something that isn't working. I've tried everything...other than lowering my standards - God's standards. I could be like other young women that I know who want this so badly that they've settled for less than God's ideal or let the temptation of sex overtake them, only to find themselves pregnant outside of a marriage relationship. I could do those things - if I allowed myself to...but that's not what God's plan is for the life of His child. I'm not judging them - please don't get me wrong...I'm just saying, I've tried so hard to be faithful and to be patient...for 16 years I've waited, and tried to follow the design God has for marriage and children - yet nothing. Wow thanks! Thanks for noticing!! And what do I get as my reward...well let's see on May 21 - solely because I'm 35 - I will become high risk should I ever get pregnant. The likelihood of me getting pregnant decreases by several percentage points. The likelihood of me having a child with Downs Syndrome or another birth defects increases several percentage points. Then if those statistics aren't depressing enough - my risk of getting three different types of cancer increase several percentage points - solely because I've never had sex or had a child. WOW! What super benefits for being patient and waiting. Seems like your doomed if you and doomed if you don't. Don't get me wrong - I know God is powerful and he can/does provide healthy children to women over 35 and there are millions of single women who don't have cancer. I know this...but the reality of those statistics make me stop and ask WHY? I don't know - maybe God is saving me from heartache...but that heartache must be pretty big - because this heartache is almost too much for me to handle any more.
I know it doesn't sound like I'm applying the verses that I've learned since I was a in the toddler nursery. I've not forgotten them, or the truths of God's Word. But I'm being honesty here folks - and let's be honest - how many of us ALWAYS apply a Bible Verse instantly to a struggle we have. And isn't honesty about a situation what helps our hearts to heal to actually see where God is working and healing? Often times being honest - is being human, and that's how God made us - to be human. He never promised us a life filled with rainbows and unicorns...and sometimes we have to face the pain and hurt. In life we fail, all the time...and often we have the chance to fix it. I hope that some of my failures can be fixable, and those that can...I hope I can learn to live through them.
So there you have it...I'm being honest. Hopefully, I've not failed.
Until this past Thursday at Small Group, I had never heard of this show...it looks like a show I would enjoy, and I do plan to watch it on a Friday evening when I'm home just relaxing. When I heard about the show I did some research on it - and I found this clip...one that hit home to me. This week I had two experiences in my own life that are similar to this clip.
I commute to work via the public bus system in C-bus. My commute is about 35-40 minutes long and it is during the hours when 90% of the passengers are "business" people - just trying to get to their jobs downtown or home to their families in the evening. But on occasion - more so in the evening - you will see a different type of person than that of the majority. They usually smell of body odor, alcohol, dirt, marijuana or a combination of these and other unpleasant aromas - their skin is dirty, their clothes are covered in dirt, stained or soiled, their hair often is not brushed - one might also wonder how long it's been since it was washed. One would not get close enough to experience the smell of the passengers breath - but you can tell when they smile that their teeth are in need of attention as well. It's not pleasant or appealing. I will admit that there have been times when I have to look away at what my eyes are beholding. Times when I myself have been uncomfortable, solely because of their presence on the bus. I often sit in the seat nearest the window, using the seat next to me for my purse and bag (both of which I wrap my arm through for safety purposes). This makes it possible for me to have the entire bench (2 seats) to myself - not to be selfish or appear to be above others, but room on the bus is limited and it's nice to have my own space. Once I'm settled in I take out a book or my Bible to read or my Blackberry to scroll through/send e-mails, check Facebook, or listen to my selections on Pandora. I'm in my own world - occasionally looking around the bus in between stops. At each stop I discretely peek over the top of my book or move my focus to the front door. I evaluate the status of seating options and the number of people getting on - and if necessary I (inside) moaningly move my purse and bag to my lap to allow another person to sit next to me - praying they aren't "weird" or smelly, and that they won't be on the bus for long - again, I just like to have my own space. For the record - to date I've only had to share my seat twice!
Rewind to Thursday - I had a nice spot near the back of the bus. I like the back of the bus because I can see the majority of the people on the bus - and I'm OCD about being able to see everyone around me whether I'm on the bus, sitting at a table enjoying dinner with friends, or finding my spot in my ADG class...I just like to see those around me. Thursday beheld a beautiful morning in Cbus - it was the first in a while that wasn't extremely hot or had hints at the threat of rain. During my brief time of being a bus commuter - I've learned that these types of a conditions generally mean the bus will attract more people, and on those days usually the bus is pretty full. More people want to get out of their homes and experience the beautiful day - handle any errands they may need to accomplish. Thursday was no different. The bus stopped at EVERY stop - along my 10 mile journey. Each stop had no less than 3 people getting on - so the bus was filling quickly. Occasionally a passenger or two would get off, as others boarded - but that didn't seem to be the norm so much on Thursday...as it is most mornings. As the bus pulls away from each stop a pleasant female computerized voice says "Next stop ______ & _____, followed by _______ & _____." The bus arrived at Broad & Glenwood Avenue. Broad & Glenwood is located in a very low income, somewhat high crime area of town. I forgot to mention that my bus ride takes me through this area - I mean it's not uncommon that the closer you get to any downtown area of any major city the neighborhood around the downtown is similar to the area I'm referring to. In Cbus this particular area is referred to as "The Bottoms", as it sets at the bottom of a hill. Back to the bus stop! I did my quick glance - one passenger getting on, no one getting off - but still ample seating, especially towards the front - no need to move my belongings! The passenger got on - by this point I was back to my book - and she slowly walked down the aisle. Usually the bus is somewhat noisy - the female voice telling you of the upcoming stops, the ding of the "STOP REQUESTED" button - which also has the same female voice saying "STOP REQUESTED", the loud ventilation system, the usual roar of a diesel type engine and sometimes the sound of people talking or children laughing. But not at this moment - at the moment the lady was moving through the bus the sound of nothingness filled the bus and to make it even more awkward the bus wasn't moving. Often if the bus is running ahead of schedule the driver will wait for a couple of moments to get back on track, but that wasn't the case that morning - I'm not really sure what the delay was a result of. As she walked down the aisle - I could see that she was not a "business" person. She had long stringy hair that was matted in some places while others were just strands of stringy, oily hair that was all pulled into a ponytail - that appeared to have been slept on. She was dirty - her clothes were dirty and they didn't' fit. She was pulling something - very slowly down the aisle and you could tell by the sound that it was off balance - walking past the open seats in the front and middle of the bus. I soon realized she was coming to the back - with very limited seating. The closer she got to me - I heard God saying, "Megan - move your stuff." "No!" "Megan move your stuff - they will know you are a Christian by your love, and today love means moving your stuff." "Fine, but I'm not happy about this God." I moved my stuff, but went quickly back to the book - not making eye contact with anyone...especially the slow boarding passenger. She passed my seat - and there in the corner of my eye I saw a large black suitcase - bulging with stuff. Zippers unzipped, clothes hanging out. "What in the world?" The bus was moving again by this point and she found her spot on a long bench behind me, but still in my line of peripheral vision. She sat down and gave out a deep breath - the aroma from her body filled the air. She then started unpacking everything - putting it on the bench next to her. She gave out a deep sigh and then announced that she was "just trying to leave". "Leave what?" I wondered. By this point I had read the same line several times, and was trying to look out of the corner of my eye, but not stare. I then realized that with all she was pulling out - this black suitcase probably contains all that belongs to her. A suitcase the size of one I would use to take on a week's vacation - contained all that belonged to her. The humbleness brick hit me hard in the head - and soon I was fiighting back tears. She continued saying it over and over again "I'm just trying to leave." She wouldn't answer when someone asked what she was leaving - but the evidence of her need to re-pack and the discombobulate appearance indicates that whatever she was leaving, she was leaving in a hurry, and getting to that spot on the bus was helping her leave. She quickly re-packed everything neatly into the suitcase - and the bus had arrived at Broad & High...where I get off the 32 window coupe (as my Dad calls it!). I put my book in my bag, stood up, straightened my skirt, picked up my belongs and headed for the door. Leaving the "departing" woman sitting on the bus. But the image of her hasn't left my mind - since I left her behind.
The departing lady had little compared to most of us on that bus. She was poor, when it came to the world's standards - who am I fooling, even my standards would say she was poor. She was unattractive to the world - to me. But as I sat on the bus listening to her speak and hurriedly re-pack her belongings, it soon hit me that to God she was another person that He loved, that may need to know of His love. I discarded her and didn't even want her to sit next to me for 10 min. Why? Because she smelled, or her hair wasn't just so - or because her clothing was stained. SHAME ON ME! How shallow of me - how horrible of me. I have never thought of myself as shallow or above others. But on Thursday - I had to do a perspective alignment - my heart that morning was just as cold to this woman as the sun was warm on the outside of the bus.
Fast Forward to Friday - It was a beautiful, warm Friday evening. I had managed to get everything crossed off my "to do" list at work and I was able to leave 5 min early to catch the 5:02! That was my goal! I made it just in time. I assumed my usual spot - and prayed very few stops would be made along the way...I was itching to start my weekend and get home! Friday, I parked at a different location than usual...but that just meant getting off the bus sooner and getting home even earlier! We made it to the Hilltop in what felt like record time. By 5:30, we had worked our way to the Westgate area, and I was off the bus heading to my bright blue Vibe! There was pep in my step. We don't have dress-down days on Friday - so there I was walking down Broad Street at 5:30 p.m. - cars were filling the street. I was wearing one of my very favorite shirts, with black dress pants and my oh so cute black peep-toe slingback 2 inch heels. I was just smiling - ready for the weekend to begin! Then all of a sudden I was wobbling, my balance had left me, and the concrete sidewalk was getting closer to my face. I tried to recover - but no luck. Thud - I heard it, I felt it. There I was...purse and bag on the ground, face just centimeters from the sidewalk, my twisted legs were under me, my knees and palms were burning from the smack of the hard ground. I looked up - I was horrified. I'm here on one of the busiest roads in town at one of the busiest times, and I'm lying on the ground with my bum in the air for all who pass by to see. I slowly re-grouped, grabbing items that had fallen out of my purse/bag and started getting up. A white SUV filled with passengers slowed down to see if I was alright. I gave them a nod and a half-hearted smile to say thanks! As I was standing I could feel the "impact" in my body - my ankles were throbbing from doing the twist in those 2 inch heels. I stood there for a moment to completely regroup. I looked at my pants - no holes, that was a positive! I looked at my hands and feet - no bleeding. I knew my knees were scrapped - but I wasn't going to give Broad St. a peek at those - they just saw my bum in the air. As I was walking away a lady quickly approached me - "Are you okay?" "Yes, just a little embarrassed" "Don't worry about that - I just wanted to make sure you were okay. My husband and I saw you getting up, and he told me to come help you." "No, I'm fine. But thanks for asking." She then went on into the hardware store and I hobbled away. The pep had left my step, and I was just trying to get away. When I got to my car, I put my belongings on the passenger seat, pulled up my pant leg and assessed my new boo-boo. My knee was banged up, but nothing major - and no blood! I thanked God that my "injuries" weren't any worse... I mean those shoes alone could have caused a serious injury. I got into my car, turned on the AC, turned up the radio and proceeded home! Still kind of fuzzy about what had just happened.
As I pulled away - I couldn't help but believe, that two complete strangers would stop to make sure that I was okay. They could have looked at me through the corner of their eye continuing on with their business, or even just looking away from the situation. I again was humbled - this time I was the "different" person. I was the unattractive person lying on the sidewalk. But God used a small rock in the sidewalk to teach me a lesson, and to bring me literally flat on my face. I, like the departing lady, was just trying to get away - even though away was to the start of my weekend, I was heading somewhere. And along the way I had a minor delay - mine wasn't a slow suitcase with a busted wheel that was bulging with my belongings, rather a rock that I stepped on and landing me on the ground. I'm sure just like me, as I was lying the ground with my belongings scattered on the sidewalk - she too was embarrassed to have all of her belongings scattered on the seat next to her for the entire back portion of the bus to see. However, unlike her those around me stopped to make sure I was okay. That I didn't need help. But the departing lady - wasn't as fortunate. Instead she was judged, discarded and who knows what else happened in the minds of others on the bus. How heartbreaking! How could I be that person - I always strive to see others with Christ's eyes - eyes of compassion, that see those around me as needing a Savior and experiencing His Love & Forgiveness. Yet, that morning I looked away. How shameful of me. While I've confessed this sin to God and he has forgiven me - may I never forget the picture of the departing lady. May it never be too far back in my memory bank - may I always remember the departing lady, and may I always attempt to see those around me with Christ's eyes.
I've been "gone" for a few weeks - and much has changed in my world...so I thought I'd let those who follow know about some updates on items I've posted about over the last few months.
Work - As most know my previous job ended on May 26...and I left that job without having another job lined up. With having almost 6 months of notice about the conclusion of this position this was not the place I wanted to be in...but it was where God wanted me to be. And while that was hard to understand or see...then - I can look back and praise him for this time. I was able to spend lots of time with family and lots of necessary time preparing for VBS at IBC...as I was the Director this year, and due to different circumstances - I found out this would be my official role in VBS on May 13th...and VBS was to start on June 27th. So needless to say my days weren't wasted...but rather very productive. However, on Tuesday, June 15th I was offered a position in the Credit Department of a large bank headquartered in Cbus. I was so excited...it was the position I was looking for - providing administrative support to two VP's and also using many of my event/meeting planning skills! On Wednesday - I will be with the bank one month and I LOVE IT!! I work in their downtown corporate office, so I've been taking public transportation (which I'm sure will provide the content of future posts!). The two gentlemen that I support are very appreciative of me being their and are very excited to have me join the team. When I took the position, I prayed that God would allow many many opportunities to share Christ with those around me. During my second week - I found out that one of the guys I support is Jewish...that was totally a God thing. So I've recently started reading and do a refresher on the Jewish religion their Holidays and how as a Christian I can demonstrate Christ's love in a non-offensive way. I really just want to be a light to my boss - and use the opportunities God provides...in HIS time. I'm just starting to build a relationship with my boss - so I don't want to do anything that will harm that initial foundation. I know that this isn't going to be a conversion that happens overnight - but I want to be used of God in this situation.
VBS - VBS went very well this year! I praise the Lord for the wonderful staff, a great group of kids and beautiful weather. We had as many as 71 one night - with 80 total enrolled for the week...most having not connection to IBC!!! We raised $264.16 for our missions project to help children affected by the earthquakes in Haiti and Chili - our goal was $150...those kids amazed me with their generosity! And best part of the week - we had one boy who accepted Christ as his Savior! We are going to start the follow-up process soon...once we have a better understanding of how things are going to run this Fall in our Youth/AWANA programs!
Pastor Search - As you know the Search Committee met with four candidates for face-to-face interviews in May. We narrowed our selection down to one candidate and we were very excited about the opportunity of having this man and his wife come lead IBC. Well last Sunday (July 18) the candidate and his wife came to IBC...well they actually came on Thursday and met with various groups of people on Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Sunday involved him preaching, a Potluck (like any good Baptist church would do!!) and then a round of Q&A. I thought things went very well - but I was honestly concerned about how things would turn out. I had this person as my #1 candidate since I had read his resume in February...but I wasn't sure how the IBC membership would vote. But on Wednesday evening we held a special business meeting to vote. We voted to call the candidate (who's name I will still remain anonymous...as I'm not 100% sure his church is aware, and I would hate to have that news divulged without it coming directly from him), and he accepted our call!!! WOO-WHOOO!! We are so excited to have him join the IBC family and for the possibilities of how God is going to use IBC to reach the Westgate/Hilltop areas!! A confirmed date of his arrival has not yet been announced - but I know that they are hoping to be with us by the start of September...but there is much that needs to happen on their end, like selling a house. Being the "thinker" that I am - I couldn't help but reflect on how IBC had come full circle with process. The Search Committee met for the first time on Sunday, July 26 2009 and on Sunday, July 18 (almost one year later) we had a candidate preaching for us to consider. It's been a rough year - on so many levels and much has changed...but I praise the Lord that through all of that has happened in the last 52 weeks he faithful has remained!
Family - My Dad's health has been kind of fair over the last several months. It's a big worry on all of us - especially my Mom. But we did receive some good news a couple of weeks ago...the lesion on his vocal cords continues to get smaller and it's not as red - so that was a blessing. We will take the smallest amount of good news we can get. Ashley is progressing along nicely, and is nearing the end of her third trimester...with one month and 10 days from her due date - tomorrow. We are all anticipating the arrival of this new addition and how she will change our lives forever. Hayden moves into the dorms one month from tomorrow - and just this weekend found out who is roommate will be...so that is exciting. He also found out that he has a religion class with another girl at our church who also attends Capital...so that will be good to have a familiar face in the crowd! Kari and the kids just returned from a week at family camp and they LOVED it!!! Everyone else is doing great and just keeping up with all the changes that are occurring in our family, at IBC and just everyday life stuff!
That's the most current news...it could change without notice, nothing seems to stay the same for too long around here...but for now that's the news!
I know I've not been here for a while...and it's not that I don't want to share. It's that my mind is so full and cluttered these days that I can't get my thoughts in order enough to post an update, share a story or express my feelings that don't sound like a bunch of ramblings. So instead I thought I'd share a song that has been very close to my mind in the middle of all that I am experiencing.
Please continue to pray for me...my need of job is so heavy on my mind that it's continually there being tossed about - like a wave in the sea during a storm... thankfully I'm able to sleep - but I'm not sure how long that luxury will last. However, as soon as I wake up - no matter the time of day or night...the reality is there. I feel like I can't even go to the store to purchase food or pay for a tank of gas without first wondering if I'm making the right decision or if I should spend less. The worry of getting injured or sick without medical insurance - paralyzes me. The thought of not having enough money to pay for the basic needs of my household and life - are overwhelming and suffocating me. I know God will provide - it's just the waiting for Him to provide that I'm struggling with. I'm a rather patient person - I've waited for much longer than 5 months for most of "big" things that I have in my life - but all of those some things didn't have a deadline attached to it, they didn't have an expiration date...it's when a deadline is attached that I have trouble with waiting...and now with only 12 working days left of guaranteed employment...my body is being over taken by fear, worry and burden. I've been clinging to the verses that reveal His promise of provision and supply...it's what gets me out of bed each day. It's just making the practical part of me, rest in these promises. So please pray!!
I'm a Breaking News creeper. When Breaking News occurs...I follow the story for hours, days, weeks, until the story is resolved or the updates are no longer. As the details of the story unfolds the news feed usually reads "developing story"...and the details are given. I guess that's what our lives are - developing stories. Each day something new is added to our story - whether we realize it or not. Each day our story changes.
I've been gone from my blog for several days now - it's not that I've not had anything to write about, it's just trying to figure out how to put it all into words. So I've decided to do quick re-caps of a few areas of my story- I've had some developments....
Garden ~ many spring perennials have been planted, summer perennials will be planted on Monday, and annuals for the summer will be purchased when I return from a trip later next week. My hostas are coming up nicely. My lilies are also coming back strong. And my hydrangea has some green buds. I LOVE watching life return to Villa deMegalicious during these springs months. Once I return from my trip I'll start the container garden process. FINGERS CROSSED it will work. I'll try to get some pics of the gardens and post here in the near future.
Virginia Beach ~ very early on Thursday morning, I will board a chartered bus and head to Virgina Beach, VA as a chaperon on a High School trip. Hayden's Show Choir is participating in a competition and parade for the Azalea Festival. I'm really hoping to see some beautiful azaleas...but more than that - I'm SO looking forward to going to the beach. AHH, the beach is where my heart longs to be...it's my most favorite destination!! The current weather forecast is calling for beautiful days of sun, and pleasant temps. I'm also looking forward to spending some time with some amazing teenagers. Many come from homes/backgrounds that I can't even begin to imagine. I know many of them, as I went on this same trip last year - and also through various interactions with Hayden. My hope is that my very limited and brief time with them will allow me to get to know them more, and that I can make a positive impact on their lives. I pray I will see them with Christ's eyes - that I may demonstrate His love in my words and actions towards them.
Another Girl ~ I found out yesterday that I will welcome a Great Niece in September. I've known for a few months now that I would be a Great Aunt (well I'm already a great aunt, but now I'll have the official title!) in late August or September...the official due date is September 6 (Labor Day). However, I've been very clear in letting my oldest niece Ashley (the baby's mommy) know that this newest addition WOULD NOT call me Great Aunt Meggie...I'm far too young for such a title before my name!;) Ashley is not married, so the news of an addition was rather shocking and disappointing - but our family is trying to find the positives in this current bittersweet hurdle, and we are looking forward to having another person to love. The news of a girl - was welcomed by the ladies in our family...the guys, well they just rolled their eyes and said "Go figure!". The new addition will bring our family count to 14 - making the ratio 10 to 4 - GIRLS RULE!!
Job~ I'm currently at the 4.5 week mark before my position is completely transferred, and I become unemployed. I had a private emotional breakdown one evening last week, as the reality of the end seemed to be closer than I'd wanted it to be. However, God is continuing to work and allowing me to explore possible opportunities - I have two interviews this coming week. One on Monday and another on Wednesday! I continue to aim in resting in God's timing and His plan.
Sleep ~ with the onset of my last year in my early thirty's coming to an end, I'm noticing my body does not accept caffeine the way it once did, and I'm not able to pull off the late nights as I once did either. This has been a hard truth to face - as I'm a self-diagnosed caffeine addict. I am dependent on caffeine...it helps me get through my day and if I don't have it before 10:00 a.m., I get a headache and my mood is not attractive. It used to be, I could drink a can of Pepsi (my preferred drink!) at 9:30 p.m.and within moments I could fall asleep. Yet now, if I drink it after 7:30 at night - I'm up for most of the night. Now I'm naturally a night owl - but with the onset of "old age", I'm not able to function during the following day - if I stay up too late...after 1:00 a.m. So this combo called for a change - so I've tried to limit the amount of and time of intake of any form of caffeine. I've not given it up - that would be a sad day. In addition, I try to be in bed by 10:15 - 10:30...usually reading or scanning facebook - but my body is starting the process of slowing down and getting a decent night of sleep. It's been amazing how well I sleep and how refreshed I am in the morning. I also just have more motivation in general. Not to mention, I think my clothes are fitting much better!
Singleness ~ since Easter, I've really been struggling with the Single status. I'm not sure what has triggered this bout of struggle in my Singleness Adventure - but it's been pretty bad. No - those around me don't know I'm struggling...or at least I don't think they do. I've tried to continue on with life as is when I'm around friends, family or co-workers - but when it's just me...the tears are steadily falling , the questioning is occurring and the desire to share my life with someone else is painfully there. Usually these "low points" come only for a day or two - but this time it is lingering longer. So I'm currently praying for God to calm my anxious heart, to either fill the desire or remove it, and to help me to remain content on the path He's selected me to walk down...even though I'm scared that I'll be on this path alone, for the rest of my life. Prayer would be appreciated. Pity is not welcomed.
...and there you have it! Those are the updates in my developing story.
First I sorted through my buttons and found the sizes and colors I wanted to use - the nursery is gray walls, black furniture and the bedding/accent pieces are going to be bright fun girly colors - pink, purple, yellow, turquoise, etc. 
Here is the "K" - almost completely painted. I didn't paint the back - to help with adhering it to the fabric covered canvas.
I used a pretty shade of pink, called Pink Chiffon - so that those places that buttons didn't cover up, wouldn't just be white. I found this paint at Michael's it was Satin Acrylic - so it gave a little sheen when it was dry. 
Once the letter was painted - I let it completely dry, and then I "played around" with the buttons to position them and create the design I wanted. It took some time - but it was like putting a puzzle together, just finding which one wentn in the exact location. I had MANY more buttons sorted than needed, but I wanted to make sure I had several size and color options. Once I had the design - I then began attaching the buttons with hot glue. I tried to cover the entire top surface - that's almost impossible since the buttons are round and it's a squared/straight edge. I wanted to make sure it looked like a "K", and not a pile of hot glued buttons - in the end.
This is once all the buttons were glued on. I let them sit overnight to make sure they got good and set. Some had to be re-glued for a more secure fit, but for the most part all of them set up really well. Unfortunately, I forgot to take pictures during the other phase of assembly - but I used a white canvas, gray fabric quarters and a canvas frame kit - all purchased at JoAnn's. The frame was 8x10 - and the actual letter itself was about 5 inches long.
And this is the final "product". I used a heavy crafting glue to adhere the "K" to the canvas - to again provide extra security. I let it dry flat for the first hour or so, and then set it upright (as it if were hanging on a wall) for about 30 min - to make sure that it wasn't going to slip. The letter itself is not flush, it does sit up "off of the canvas" - so it adds some additional dimension. You can sort of see this in the picture.
